We Need More Nutcracker Adventures

We're closing in on Christmas time again - and if you look around the TRPG community, you're bound to stumble over more than a few queries from people looking for advice on Christmas-themed adventures and encounters to send their players on to celebrate the season. And more often than not, the first thing anyone is going to recommend is Krampus - either encouraging the DMs to make use of the concept themselves, or taking their pick from a sea of Krampus-themed modules out there.

The Aquabats episode can stay, though.

Look, I get it. I can see why Krampus became such a popular choice. For a lot of people, fighting monsters is a key part of D&D, and there aren't many other notable Christmas monsters out there. But the oversaturation of Krampus has made him completely lose any appeal to me. In the last couple of years, Krampus has gone from being a fun bit of trivia to being one of the things about Christmas that everyone knows, and that more people have done something with than I can count. He's played out. He isn't fun and new and exciting any more, and hasn't been for years. Surely there are other sources we can draw from to create a scenario with an unmistakably Christmas feel that still wouldn't be out of place at the tabletop.

As a matter of fact, there's one in particular that's worth a look. The Nutcracker and the Mouse King, by E.T.A. Hoffmann.

Raise your hands. What do you know about the story of the Nutcracker? Well, there's a Nutcracker in it. He's given to the protagonist by Herr Drosselmeyer and fights the Mouse King. There's a Sugarplum Fairy involved in there somewhere. The music goes "da da da da DA DA dadada," you know the one. A lot of people are familiar with the iconography of the Nutcracker story, but can anyone tell me what actually happens in it?

No? Didn't think so.

Did you know that the Mouse King has seven heads, for one? Yeah, that's a detail from the original book that gets left out a lot - and it's theorized that it may be a reference to the phenomenon of rat kings, so that's one evocative image to draw on.

Did you know that the Nutcracker wages a nightly war between the toys and the invading mice, who want to eat all the candy and chew up the toys in the house?

Did you know that there's a kingdom of dolls that the Nutcracker rules over, with forests of sweets, gates made of sugared almonds, gingerbread men who suffer from toothaches, and a castle made of marzipan (under repairs because a giant named Sweettooth ate part of the roof)? 

Did you know there's a subplot about the Nutcracker having to find a sword that can slay the Mouse King (this, by the way, is solved by having the protagonist's brother give him a sword from one of his toy soldiers, who he punishes for not fighting the mice earlier by "forbidding them from playing the Hussar's March for a year;" no word on whether or not they listen)?

Did you know that three chapters (that's about one-fifth of the book, for reference) are devoted to the origin of the Nutcracker, and it's begging to be mined for inspiration?

See, as the story goes, it all began when Lady Mouserinks, the Mouse Queen (just go with it) led an army of mice to eat the fat that was supposed to be used for a sausage at a king's banquet. In response, Herr Drosselmeyer - who happens to be the court inventor - made traps for the mice, killing the children of the Mouse Queen. This, incidentally, is how mousetraps were invented.

In response, the Mouse Queen - who apparently commands great magical powers despite being, by all accounts, the size of an ordinary mouse (you'll see what I mean later) - placed a curse on the princess to turn her into a nutcracker. According to the court astrologer, this curse could only be lifted by having her consume the magical nut Crackatook, after it was opened by the teeth of a man who had never in his life shaved or worn boots, who must then close his eyes and take seven steps backward. You know, ritual stuff.

Despite the court searching the world for years (which includes meeting the King of Dates, the Prince of Almonds, and "the Society of Natural Sciences in Squirrelton"), they can't find the nut, nor a man who suits the requirements, until Herr Drosselmeyer heads home to Nuremburg, where it turns out that his cousin, a puppet-maker, has the nut (he found it when he got in a fight with a nut seller who was blocking his door, and a cart ran over his bag of nuts in the commotion, breaking all but one). The king promises his daughter's hand in marriage to whoever can crack the nut, but everyone who tries breaks their teeth on it - except for Herr Drosselmeyer's nephew, who happens to have never shaved or worn boots. He manages to crack the nut, but after handing it to the princess and lifting her curse, he takes the required seven steps backward with his eyes closed...and, with his seventh step, squashes the Mouse Queen. Who goes on to sing this.

Oh, Crackatook, hard nut, now I must die,

Hee hee, pee pee.

Nutcracker, young man, you too will die.

My seven-crowned son will avenge my death,

And take from you your living breath.

Oh, life, so vibrant and red, I - squeak!

I am very mature.

Anyway, with her dying breath, the Mouse Queen places a curse on the nephew that turns him into a nutcracker - the same one given by Herr Drosselmeyer to his goddaughter - and ever since, the Mouse King has been out for revenge for his mother's death!

Let's recap. The story of the Nutcracker is full of strange monsters, curses, magic items, bizarre locations, rituals, fantastic races, and grand quests...in other words, the perfect material for a campaign! Don't just take my word for it, give it a look yourself.

I'd love to see people do more with the Nutcracker when it comes to Christmas-themed modules. In fact, I've been workshopping one of my own based on the story. I can't promise a release date any time in particular - real life gets in the way, you know the drill - but I think there's plenty in the story that can be mined for a hexcrawl. Watch this space!

In the meantime, though, this week's Friday Encounter will carry on the Christmas spirit, drawing inspiration from another famous Christmas story. And there's more holiday fun on the horizon!